Be Kind To Yourself
Welcome Back! This is December Journal Entry #2. Click HERE to read December Journal #1.
BE KIND TO YOURSELF.
How many of you do this? I believe many of us who suffer with chronic illness have a real difficult time with this. I too struggled with it. Oddly, it was easier to be kind to others but challenging when it was time to show myself some compassion.
Compassion is the understanding of suffering. It is the most important element in healing. There is no peace, joy, or hope until those who suffer are understood.
– Anthony William, Medical Medium
I often wondered about the reason for this. Was it an ego thing, where I was just too proud to accept I wasn’t doing well? Maybe it was low self esteem? Was I just accustomed to speaking negatively to myself? Regardless of the reason, I had to do something about it.
Pivot Your Thoughts
It is so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of thoughts and spiral downward into a very unproductive mind space. Notice my choice of adjective, UNPRODUCTIVE. The reality is that nothing productive happens when we get trapped there.
Now please, do NOT blame yourself for this. This is not happening because we are weak minded. No, no, no….those of us who suffer with chronic illness are far from that. In fact, our minds are super strong! Think about it we are able to deal with a ton of pain and suffering, on a daily basis. Some of us are even taking care of family and children on top of that. How mind blowing is that? That means we dealing with our own issues while still being able to think of others. That’s an amazing amount of mental strength and a perfect example of someone who is mentally tough.
So what did I do? Well I practiced the art of pivoting my thoughts. I used this as a way to help me be kinder to myself in times that I needed to show myself some compassion.
The Art of Pivoting
Before sharing how I did this I want to state that this isn’t something that I created nor is this the only way to do this. Gabby Bernstein shared an excellent video on How to Stop Negative Thoughts FAST. I highly recommend watching it.
Okay so here’s what I do when I want to transition from a negative to positive thought. These are the steps I take to pivot:
- Recognize the negative thought that is occurring
- Stop for a second and say to yourself, “I can keep thinking this (negative thought) or I can choose to think this (positive thought)”
- Understand that you have freewill to choose either option
- Chose the option that will move you closer to HEALING
Let’s Reframe the Thoughts
In theory, this sounds super easy but the challenge is believing the positive thought enough to choose it. That is what actually causes the pivot.
Sometimes when I couldn’t get myself to pivot, I found that my husband’s positive words to have helped. It was as though he had put the positive energy into the words (with his intentions) and I could feel it or shall I say believe it. I know that may sound strange to read but hey there’s nothing normal about my chronic illnesses either. Actually I’m kind of used to unusual things, lol.
So here are some examples of my thoughts. For the sake of keeping a light heart, I rather name negative thoughts, “Stifling Thoughts” and positive thoughts, “Thoughts to Move Forward”. I don’t want the word negative to make you feel like you can relate to it, like you deserve it. I want you to be able to feel that the thought is keeping you in a state that you want to move from it.
| Stifling Thought | Thought to Move Forward |
|---|---|
| I’m not healing | Healing is happening even if I can’t see it |
| I’m not healing fast enough | My body is healing at a pace that is safe and comfortable for me |
| I’m lazy, and can’t do anything | Resting is a powerful healing tool that allows my body’s energy to go toward healing |
| Maybe I’m not meant to heal | I deserve to heal |
| I don’t feel like doing this anymore | At any moment I can choose to return to my previous way of living, no one is stopping me from doing that, but the question is, “Do I really want to go back to the lifestyle, because it was full of suffering and confusion”. (Before making this decision take the time to list all the healing that has happened) |
Sharing a Bit of Kindness with You
Like I mentioned in my previous post, December can be a very challenging month for those of us dealing with chronic illnesses. It can make you feel as though you are alone on this journey. But I want you to know that I see you and I can relate to how you may be feeling. You are not alone, I am right here with you. So be kind to yourself and give pivoting a try.
At anytime you are feeling alone, leave a comment, or watch my YouTube videos. That’s what I used to do when I felt down.
Hang in there my friend, this moment will pass and you will be able to celebrate life once again! We got this!
